yesterday

we went in on a saturday to take care of the last of our office move. my boss and the guy helping us were moving a huge piece of glass, and when my boss went to set it down it cracked, randomly, and a maybe 30 pound piece of it fell onto the palm of his right hand, edge first. the tendons and nerves were sliced open to the bone, and we had a hell of a time getting him in a car. my boss is also my stepdad.
this was maybe 9 in the morning, and at around 5 we got word from the surgeon that he'd get the use of all of his fingers back, with maybe some loss of sensation in the ring or pinky finger. i didn't realize it but i'd been holding in a lot of stress all day, just trying to be calm for my mother who was pretty strong but hurting, be calm for my stepdad, for my whoevers. i lost it badly later that night, and called the ex up to have someone to cry to. but then she got sad and my psychotic need to comfort others took over and i shut it all down again and talked about other things.

i don't know what's wrong with me. i'm getting more stupid as i age. shouldn't it be the other way around?